Tag Archive: cancer


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I just got through watching a commercial advertising a weight loss meal plan showing before and after pictures invariably showing the same person weighing at least 50 pounds less than their previous state. The first thought that popped in my head was that my first doctor told me that diet doesn’t have anything to do with your health. It’s curious this type of commercial will air frequently on television and even pop up at you online yet people believe what the doctor says regardless of what they’ve seen repeatedly in pictures just through advertisements.

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Does this say more about the ineffectiveness of marketing or the gullibility and lack of basic recall ability in the minds of a scarily high percentage of the masses? I lean more toward the latter excuse because from what I’ve seen, we are easily led into buying highly marketed items like the latest Apple iPad.

Unfortunately, I’m being faced with the decision to do chemo again due to another tweak in my diagnosis and this time I’m leaning towards saying yes. I know that diet is an important factor. I also know that chemo is my best shot at surviving for a longer period of time than 3 years (2 if you factor in the past year I’ve spent dealing with my diagnosis). I’m guesstimating chemo as my best chance based on the limited research information I can find on the tweaked diagnosis update…go figure.

I’m just glad that I did wait because right now I’m as prepared as I can be to receive a seriously dangerous chemical into my body. I’ve been living organically, detoxing and treating my body right for a full year to prepare for the now 4 rounds of recommended treatment from a doctor I trust. This is a far cry from the originally recommended 12-16 rounds plus the pounds of flesh equal to one arm.

I need to spend a bit of time on finding research…again (hopefully I’ll be able to tap into those M.D. Anderson files since I’m tapped out in online resources). But, if chemo is what’s required I hope to defy some of those recurrence odds that are associated with the side effects of taking these recommended poisonous carcinogens by continuing my healthy lifestyle afterward. I certainly think it’s possible and am completely optimistic since there are so many things working in my favor at this time as opposed to last year when faced with the same decision.

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My Truth

They’ve laid their ideas of being a warrior on me. The armor…the sword…the shield. They’ve glorified my efforts to regain health for this gift called life and called it a “battle” or a “fight” when I don’t think it is either at all.

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I have been unable to connect with others with cancer because I didn’t follow the “tried and…true” path. I didn’t do chemo and I found a way to adhere to something that most people wouldn’t consider in their wildest dreams. I regularly question any doctor’s motives and seek research on my diagnosis concerning chemo’s success and role in recurrence. I’m unrelateable to people I have met who have dealt with or are dealing with cancer and I find them unrelateable to me.

I haven’t bought into the concept that I’m fighting some glorified battle that everyone who hasn’t had cancer in my circle tries to convince me I’m fighting. I find it interesting that so many people pretend to know what they are talking about and fail to really listen to what someone like me (who has first hand experience) knows about being diagnosed with what most consider a death sentence.

It’s out of good intention of course, but good intention does not have it’s desired effect in all cases. People worry about me getting depressed about my situation since I’ve been diagnosed with depression in the past. That’s why they call it a fight. It sounds strong, maybe because it’s been reiterated so much. For me, it automatically draws a picture of scarf clad, bald so-called “winners” who braved their way through treatments and didn’t die from complications. Excuse me for not subscribing to that similarly depressing thought to keep me from being depressed. I actually haven’t had a bought with real depression the entire time I’ve been healing. On the contrary, I feel more alive now than I ever did!

No, for me this isn’t a fight. It’s not a battle. This is a period of time in my life that I have been given the strength to overcome only by the grace of My Father who is My Elohim that loves me. I wouldn’t be here without His strength that kept me disciplined when I know myself to have none.

This is my truth. I do not know yours. If you have been diagnosed and are being treated with chemo I think you are braver than I am. Your armor, shield and sword are not being taken away by my interpretation of this experience. Continue fighting your battle with all the gusto and strength you can muster and I pray Our Creator carries you through this obstacle course called cancer.